Male Infertility: The Lone Bull Syndrome

Do not let the title fool you. This article is so important for women than for men. As a middle-aged man, approaching 60 years on this planet, I have unique perspective when it comes to issues related to male infertility. I'm standing on top of a long and lonely hill. Interestingly, the increase was more treacherous and threatening that I would ever admit ... until now.

WHAT IS INFERTILITY
The American Academy of Family Physicians, AmericanFamily.org defines infertility as the inability to get pregnant after trying for at least 1 year without using birth control. The AAFP said that about 15% of couples are infertile. Among the reported cases, about one-third of infertility cases are caused by male factors alone. All cases of infertility are not permanent. However, an estimated 6-7000000 couples are affected.

CLEAR STIGMA
There are many reasons why a man may be infertile. The reasons may vary. A man can produce a low sperm count or sperm produced that are deficient for any reason; and are unable to fertilize an egg. Some men have a service blocked vas deferens (the tube through which sperm from the testicles) or as in my case, the vas deferens is missing completely. Lifestyle factors such as drugs and alcohol can cause infertility. STD (sexually transmitted disease) may also be a reason. Rare causes turn contribute to stigma. Shame is the realization of being unable to conceive. Whether good or bad, for many men, manhood and bear children is equivalent to adulthood. The realization leads to feelings of shame and disbelief. The first reaction is denial. Often what follows is a behavior to compensate for the loss of perception of masculinity.

MY STORY
I was diagnosed as congenital infertile at the age of 25, after three years of trying to conceive. My wife and I had gone through a "working up sterility" of our respective doctors in February 1981. At that time, few options are available. ICSI (an embryologist uses a microscopic needle to inject a single sperm directly into the egg) was not available or too expensive at the time. my first reaction was denial and durable. Then I started a series of behaviors to compensate for my alleged lack of manhood. I drank more difficult, involved in decision risks, activities, dark fringe of society. I became a womanizer, angry, volatile, almost discontent. I sabotaged good jobs and achievements under the pretext of "no worries." I had no person rely on, not my wife, my father, the clergy, or even my own brother who may have had the same problem I want to make a very important point in this case. Those around me have been affected or wanted to help, but never address the issue

YOU MUST Grieve
At the age of 46 and enrolled in nursing school, I knew I was never going to graduate if I did not bring my self-destructive behavior under control. I sought the advice of a therapist who gave me an important tip. She explained that she would not be able to reconcile with my crying least infertility. The therapist explained that many of my expectations were lost with my diagnosis, especially the hope that it would lead to children. He explained that the loss of this wait can be as devastating as a miscarriage or the loss of a child. She suggested ways for me to come to accept this reality. That was the turning point for me. The grieving process was not easy to 46 years it would have been in the 26; the fact is that this is a necessary step toward healing and acceptance stage.

The discovery of infertility reveals serious psychosocial problems for men and women. We can not avoid this reality. Note that it alone can prolong the agony for decades. Take it from an old bull who stands on top of the hill ... You can not do it the easy way, simply do not more difficult than it already makes.